Holy shit. I'm gonna die. In a good way. I think? aghhhh, start over.
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Holy shit. I'm gonna die. But it'll be fun. And I'm not actually going to die.
Wait. I'm gonna die, but I'm not going to die? First of all, one is "gonna", and then in the other I actually bothered to write out the whole thing. But more importantly, that's a ridiculous contradiction. OK. ANYWAY.

I'm going to go on a big ol' camping trip. I'ma drivin down da Macy's and then to southern Illinois. And no, you Chicago tards, I'm not going to Peoria, Bloomington, or Rockford or any other place you consider 'southern Illinois'. You should get that checked out, seriously. Come on. Rockford is actually further NORTH than Chicago! I'm talking about Carbondale, Chester, Cave-in-Rock, Cairo, and places like that. Ones that are south of I-64 (gmts).

For future reference, "gmts" stands for "Google Map that shit." I've typed it before, and I talk about obscure locations a lot so I thought I would make it more convenient for future use. Also, it has a cuss word in it, and they tend to make phrases with cuss words in them into abbreviations like that (wtf, stfu, lmao, etc. (that last one isn't an abbreviation--I'm actually using that the way it's intended to be used)). Google Maps is the best. Chris Parnell and Andy Samberg knew what they were talking about (PLEASE tell me somebody gets that reference).

I'm going to stay the night at Macy's in Charleston tomorrow night, go camping for 2 nights, sleep at Macy's Thursday night, and come home Friday. And I'm bringing Ashwin with me! (And Macy, of course.)

We're going to go to:

Chester
SPARTA!!!! That's right. Sparta. Just so we can say that three-word line we all know and love (the males tend to anyway)...
Johnson Creek Recreation Area (plus I need to add Route 151 to my collection (gmts))
Giant City State Park
Metropolis (Superman that ho)
Cairo (the southern tip of Illinois, just for shiggles) (It's supposed to be 100°F there Tuesday; good thing we're going Wednesday!)
Garden of the Gods (probably the highlight of the trip)
Cave-in-Rock
Olney (a town full of albino squirrels)

It's going to be awesome. Except for the fact that it's going to be 90°F and humid during the day. Make that low-mid 90's on Wednesday, but at Johnson Creek we're going to go swimming. So it's not THAT bad...except when we have to camp. At night. I hope we don't have to go to sleep when it feels like you're wading in a bowl of fucking chicken noodle soup outside.

Oh, and I get to add a SHITload of signs to my collection when we do this =)

Going to bed so I can leave tomorrow! I should get an oil change for my dad's car tomorrow...and I leave at 12:30. Bye y'all! (except maceface and the lil guy)